Gestures like buying the person behind you a coffee, handing over a parking ticket with extra time on it or even just helping someone at the grocery store are all kind things to do.
Sometimes you can take it one step further and help someone at the store when they can’t quite afford it or don’t have enough money on them, but would you ever pay for their shopping because they expect you to?
A woman has turned to the New York Post’s ‘Dear Abby’ advice column for help, writing: “A while ago, as I was standing in line at the grocery store, a young woman with seven or eight items tied up the checkout process by leaving her groceries on the belt, and then running back to grab something she forgot. It happens. I get it.”
The sympathetic shopper then continued as she revealed the young woman was buying branded items including a pasta sauce costing $8. Yet when she came to pay she used her food stamp card alongside some cash but was still left short of the total amount needed.
But this is when things got a little bit awkward as the post continued: “Since I was next in line, she looked at me and waited. The cashier and bagger (who appeared to know her) stared at me as well, waiting for me to cover the difference.”
The shopper explained that she often tries to help, meaning she would usually offer to cover the difference yet this time she couldn’t afford it.
She added: “I suppose I could have helped by showing her the 99-cent sauce that was on sale, and the store brand of mac ‘n’ cheese, etc., but I didn’t.”
Yet rather than dig into her pockets or put items back, the woman at the till continued looking back for help as the original shopper revealed things got even more difficult.
She explained: “The hostility from the customer and the food store workers was becoming more overt as the minutes ticked by. The bagger finally pulled her credit card from her wallet and paid the balance for her.”
After the tense exchange, the woman asked whether she should have paid as she questioned: “I have since felt torn by this situation and wonder whether I was right or not by refusing to pick up the rest of her tab.”
Writing back, ‘Dear Abby’, AKA Abigail Van Buren (real name Jeanne Phillips), said: “Somehow I doubt this sin of omission is going to consign you to hell. Your guilty conscience is punishment enough. To pay someone’s food bill is a kind gesture, but it is not an obligation. You couldn’t afford it at the time. Let it go.”
What would you have done in this situation?