Our reader has recently faced a serious life dilemma, and she wrote us a letter where she poured her soul out. The woman’s problem is her youngest son, 19, whom she and her husband asked to move out from their house. The young man’s parents want to enjoy their early retirement, planning to move to a smaller place. But now the whole family is in a big conflict and the woman needs advice and opinions from our readers about her uneasy situation.
Sarah’s family used to live a normal life, up until one day.
A woman named Sarah opened her letter, saying, “My husband and I are both 45 now, and we have 3 kids, a daughter, 25, and 2 sons, who’re 22 and 19 respectively. There’s always been a peaceful atmosphere in our house and in our family, we had been getting along perfectly with all of our kids and our life had been full of sweet moments.”
The spouses had some nice plans for their life. The woman shared, “My husband and I have always had the plan to work hard while we were younger, and our goal was to retire early. Thankfully, we’ve been lucky in life, and we’re now in a position to do that with all our available savings. The oldest two kids have already moved out now, and it’s just the youngest who still lives at home with us.”
Sarah added, “We have a four-bedroom house that’s in a rural area, and this is a big empty house for just us and our 19-year-old son. Our plan is to downsize, sell the house and move to some smaller place in the city. We want to travel a lot, so we don’t need a huge place for living. We’ve decided to sell our house in a few months.”
The spouses didn’t expect any problems while fulfilling their plan, but there’s a big conflict now.
Sarah goes on with her story, saying that her youngest son’s reaction wasn’t quite the one they initially expected. She explained, “Our youngest son isn’t happy about that at all. He became even more furious when he tried but couldn’t convince us to take him with us. He insists that it’s unfair that his siblings got to live at home until after college, and he has to leave now.”
The parents offered their son a good support, but it didn’t work out. Sarah added, “Dad and I offered to pay for him the first, last and security payment at any apartment he finds, but he thinks a few months notice wasn’t enough to give him time to move and look for a job. So, he literally blames us for having that plan and leaving him behind, which is not true.”
Parents have their own reasoning behind their decision, but their son thinks it’s unfair.
Sarah continues her confession, saying, “I reminded our son that he was more than lucky to have a decent childhood with plenty of luxury. I told him that even our decision to pay to get him settled is kindness. He went so mad and accused us of prioritizing our retirement over his well-being. He also said that dad and I are lucky to be able to retire at all. He took it even further, and got all his siblings as well as other family members involved.”
Sarah revealed, “Our kids supported their younger brother, to my surprise. They totally believe we should either be fair and wait for another couple years, or take the youngest kid with us. When we didn’t back down, our daughter suggested he could fly over to her house to stay there, despite sharing a one bedroom with her partner and our granddaughter. We were totally at a loss with such a disrespectful reaction from our kids.”
Now, all family members are in the argument and can’t find the truth in it.
Sarah wrote, “I think it’s insane that our three kids expect us to put our lives on hold for years just to allow the youngest to live with us. But none of our children have been talking to us much, so I guess they’re simply united against us. Our older son even said that when he buys a place of his own (he lives with some roommates right now) that we won’t be even welcome to stay there when we visit.”
The woman added, “Even our parents are against us in this situation. All people are basically saying that we’re acting selfishly and that we deprive our child of home, which is not true, and we’ve suggested him a good start of his independent life. Now both me and my husband are at a loss, we can’t discuss this situation with anyone anymore, because we immediately get judged. What should we do?”
And here’s yet another story where a woman had to make a tough decision and kick out of the house her pregnant daughter together with her six kids. Read more to find out why the desperate woman finally decided to do so and how she’s living with this guilt now.